Monday, June 11, 2012

Made it!

I put that exclamation mark in the post title on purpose. I'm trying to sound upbeat. Like 'woo hoo made it to the new city yee haa!!!'.  When really the reality is sadly a little more flat and downbeat.  I'm just bloody tired and completely worn out and sick of people being around (started 4 weeks ago with real estate agents and potential buyers constantly and now it's movers and unpackers constantly) and unfortunately the excitement I thought was going to come hasn't.  Yet.

The house is an absolute bombsite still, just crap and boxes everywhere and sooooooo much to do to get it to a place where I can relax into it.  And in the days and week(s) ahead there is a lot of taking the boys to the new school and scouts and rugby and stuff so it's all just still very busy and will requre a lot of extra energy meeting new people.

And tonight I really really thought a drink would be nice and when I was walking around the new store in the new suburb grabbing things like weetbix and lillies and batteries and light bulbs I passed the wine section and actually allowed myself to have a fully blown fantasy about drinking red wine.  Just drinking drinking drinking lots of red wine.

Don't be silly of course I didn't buy any but I was fully aware of the fact that I'm exhausted and strung out and wrung out and still sad and just unsettled I suppose and pined a bit for some escape.

But not for this lady, no siree bob.  I'm charging through this whole experience raw, man.  On the edge of reality.  It's all real here baby-o.  No blurring the edges of this little-ole life.  Uh-uh.

Told you I was tired, this is silly talk.  Can't. Form. Sentences. Tonight.

But anyway if I didn't have a blog I wouldn't write about it I'd just get on with it so maybe that's what I'll do.  Plus it's the first night here and I should be sleeping.  So night-night.

Love, Mrs D xx


  1. Welcome to your new home, Mrs. D. You have finished the deconstruction, now you will go about building up the new life. And just think, all these new people in the new area have never seen you drunk. A brand new life :-)

  2. Yay... "WELCOME HOME"..... Look ... we're all here with you! Amazing that right?

    You are super-amazing, I can totally imagine how appealing a drink would be for you right now....but you're doing it... you're doing the hardest thing and saying NO! :) Yay.

    I wish you a good nights sleep and a very productive day tomorrow!! xx

  3. Well done Mrs D!
    You're there now, one day at a time it will all fall into place . . . There will be some excitement soon enough. Hope you're sleeping good x

  4. Ewww! I hate chaos...but that's just too damn bad isn't it because that is what life is, dealing with one mess and then another. How calming to know I'm going to be able to get it all done, even if it takes a little while, I didn't have that when I was drinking. I got home from a roadtrip late Monday night and yesterday all of the bags were unpacked, that would never have happened a year ago. Madam, you and I, and the whole lot of us ex-drunks, are FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC!!

  5. Welcome to your new home! You are so very very strong and just amazing! Good for you! The sadness will ease as you adjust to your new place and new people. Hang in there Mrs D.