I have just re-joined the gym! Woo Hoo! Enough wallowing in my emotional funk. Enough ruminating over how nervous and vulnerable I've been feeling about the new book coming out and all my boring thoughts about me, my book, me, my life, me yadda yadda. Enough insecure introspection. Enough emotional eating to distract myself from uncomfortable feelings. Enough bad TV to distract myself from uncomfortable feelings. ENOUGH!
(In case you thought I was the perfect example of a sober zen housewife, I'm not! I still use food and TV to distract myself when the going gets tough.)
Anyway... that phase is over. It's time for some forward momentum. I'm going to get my body back into shape (even a little bit of shape will suffice!). I'm going to pump myself full of all those natural endorphins and serotonin and whatever-else-comes-from-exercise and I'm moving on.
Feels bloody good to be honest. I'm back at the gym where I used to go when our littlest was a pre-schooler and he attended the creche there while I worked out. I know the place. I know they have a pump class at 9.30 on a Monday morning which I used to love. I'm going to start doing that again plus maybe another class or two and sometimes my own programme of weights and cardio.
I may be 45 but I am not giving up on this body quite yet! And I'm not going to stagnate in a pit of self-absorbed despair. I'm going to get back exercising and keep focusing on all the other stuff I do (parenting and housewifeing and running Living Sober) with increased positivity and a metaphorical spring in my step!
It's not that things have been terrible but it has been quite a gritty phase lately and I have fallen into bad habits and have gained weight so I'm feeling a bit blah. Not terrible, but blah so it's good that I've decided enough is enough.
I'm still a goddamn motherfucking legend for getting through all of my life without numbing and avoiding with booze.
I'm still a sober superstar who lives every single moment of her life with a raw and wide-open brain.
And I'm still a heroic recovery warrior who feels all the feels at full volume - 150% awake and alive to everything all of the time.
And now I'm a gym bunny to boot - ha ha!
Love, Mrs D xxx
Exercise seems to be the first thing I abandon even though it's what makes me feel the best. I sort of self sabotage in this area to be honest. I love 2 things you said: not giving up on this body at 45 (I'm 47 & agree) and that we're rock stars fur being sober. I am 8+ months Sober and forget to be proud of that everyday..thanks for the reminder!
ReplyDelete"I'm still a goddamn motherfucking legend for getting through all of my life without numbing and avoiding with booze.
ReplyDeleteI'm still a sober superstar who lives every single moment of her life with a raw and wide-open brain.
And I'm still a heroic recovery warrior who feels all the feels at full volume - 150% awake and alive to everything all of the time."
Isn't it funny that now, alcohol free, we can use beating alcohol as a super-power?? :):):) We had to go through hell to get there, but we got there! That's all that matters!
Thanks for you!!!
I bet they even have a yoga class to go to...
ReplyDeleteHave fun.
I have been a gym bunny for years. Even at my drinking finest I made it to 9 am spin class on Saturday morning.
I must have been pretty tough...lol
It's like sobriety. At first it's a chore, then it becomes routine. Momentum is everything!
I HAVE to go to the gym! Exercise is an important part of my sobriety. It doesn't make me feel better on the days that I do it, but I don't feel as good on the days that I don't! So I exercise 6 days a week. and because of that, I have a fantastic resting heart rate and a healthy heart (according to my cardiologist...which I see because my resting heart rate is so low from exercise!) Enjoy your workouts Mrs. D. And is your pump class Les Mils Body Pump? If so, I do it here in the states and it is great! xo
ReplyDeleteGood on you :)
ReplyDeleteI keep quoting Judge Judy "it's better to burn out than to rust out"
When we hit our forty's often we think who cares? But we do right xxx
Michelle
Exercise is so important for me. Hope you find the perfect classes to jump start your gym mojo!
ReplyDeleteThis is exactly what I need to read RIGHT now. Thank you. Today a friend shared your blog with me. I can't wait to dig into what you have written. Big hugs! And thank you from a 45 year old on this path too.
ReplyDeleteI'm a scared 49 yr old who is worried i won't see my nine yr old grow up. I too hide my bottles I am reading your book on my kindle. Day 2 sober. Wish me luck.
ReplyDeleteYou can do it!
DeleteDeep breath...you got this!
DeleteJust finished reading your book!!! Bloody brilliant.... thankyou! ��
ReplyDelete