Feeling a bit flat... restless... not sure why... having another coffee...trying all my 'feel good' strategies..
Put a smile on my face (that worked momentarily but it slid off pretty quick)
Put a tee-light candle in my oil burner and added some delicious oil (should start to make the house smell nice soon, that usually cheers me up a bit)
Made a yummy green juice (spinach, celery, cucumber, lemon, ginger and green apple)..
Looking out at the horizon.. I've a nice hill I can look at. The sun is shining..
Um...
Yeah just one of those days I suppose. Feeling a bit weird now the book is finished. Really 'book' could read 'distraction' or 'goal'... I seem to always need one of those.
Question is.. what is my next goal?
Could try and train for a marathon YEAH RIGHT. Am always a bit jealous of my fellow sober bloggers who get into running. Not my thing. I could step up my gym work though, maybe that could be a goal.
I'm learning how to crochet with the help of my sober buddy Sue and some YouTube videos..I'm into that although I think it'll take months before I actually make something cool.
Mr D just told me I'm an overachiever and I need to chill out for a while, relax and enjoy pottering around with no pressure to deliver anything (first thesis, then book)...
Ok I'll try that. I'll try....
Novels. I need some more novels.
And cooking adventures. Maybe I'll get the cookbooks out and try some new recipes. And maybe I'll go through the house and sort out all the little piles of accumulated 'stuff' that have gathered in every corner.
That'll do for now.
And maybe I'll do lots of sober blog reading and commenting. I've been a bit remiss in my interactions with fellow sober bloggers lately, with meeting the book deadline taking up a lot of my energies. That's no good. I like the 'give and take' of this online community. I'd better step up my 'giving' and reconnect with you guys. That's the best plan of all.
Love, Mrs D xxx
Dear Mrs D,
ReplyDeleteThese are amongst the truest words ever spoken "Yeah just one of those days I suppose". With such strong media presence in our lives (press, magazines, social media +++) we somehow expect ourselves to have extraordinary lives and daily happiness. But lots of days are blah - not good, not bad - so when they happen, we somehow feel we have them a bit wrong. And maybe they are, and maybe there's more we could do - or maybe, we all need days off from happiness so that we realise again what it is with joy when we hit the next great day. Or something. Anyway, main message - you're in good company when you get nothing much days! ;-)
At the end of all that, all I really wanted to say was: your writing is always really great to read, regardless of content :-)
Best wishes as always!
Ali of the Alps
Not all days can be WOW days, some days just pass by...
ReplyDelete.today will be my 2nd sober day with all you lovely bloggers, I am so grateful to you Mrs D for you blog and sharing with us your beautiful written thoughts.
Emma b
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteEmma b from the French Alps...
Delete"Just one of those days."
ReplyDeleteThat says it all really. One big thing I hear over and over in recovery from others in recovery is "acceptance". Having to accept where you are, what you are, what is happening at that moment. Sometimes you have to accept that you are having "just one of those days". I've now got to the point of recognising an unproductive day, saying - ok what MUST be done. Do that and then that is it for the day I then read, listen to music, watch a dumb movie or gameshow on tv whatever it doesn't matter. As long as I don't find myself in that mode day in day out, week in week out I try not to dwell on it. I have to accept how I am and not set a goal that I'm always on top of my game striving to live the perfect life. My life is "good enough", that has to be "good enough", as long as "good enough" is good enough that I don't pick up a drink then that is more than good enough in the grand scheme of my life.
Oh, those wonderful sometimes grating normal days. You've had a lot of excitement lately! No wonder you're feeling the let down.
ReplyDeleteYou are totally normal. :) Just like your days.
well, OK, I take that back. You aren't that normal. :)
Or you can start planning a trip to the states to stay with your wonderful friend Sherry and we'll walk and talk and sit around and eat and love on each other for awhile.
ReplyDeleteOr you can go back to sorting through piles.
Love and kisses,
Sherry
PS - Amy and I have decided it's the moon.
It sure is hard to get used to feeling flat and being ok about that. Especially when we've been conditioned to react to as many situations as possible with "Drink Wine!" I am having this strong feeling that now I'm sober, there is so much more of me. More of me to deal with, more of me to enjoy, more of me to think about and entertain, more of me to fulfill, and be aware of. It's like I went from being a half (or quarter) person to being a great big whole one, and that's a bit of a shock.
ReplyDeleteKeep going with that crochet. You'll be making amazing things before you know it. XXX Sue
I hear you on the "meh"-ness of some days. They're not going to be all clowns and elephants days. Sometimes the most exciting thing that happens to me is that I buy a new shampoo or something like that. Meh. Even the things that normally would bring me a sense of joy, are sometimes meh. Meh. And that's ok. I have learned to just embrace those days as they are. Enjoy the silence. Take a nap. Eat haphazardly. Watch a bad show. Not try to build and conquer a new mountain. And try to accept the fact that we all have those days and it's neither good nor bad, but just is.
ReplyDeleteLove and light,
Paul
Keep your head up!
ReplyDelete