Sunday, July 27, 2014

Lego lego everywhere...

Hey lovely people in the online recovery world.. boy are we a mixed bunch. Check out the comments section on the last post if you haven't already.. there's some fantastic interactions going on there. Some wonderful support, lots of grit, plenty of brave honesty, and a whole bunch of we're-in-this-together-ness.

Some people are feeling GREAT and on top of the Sober World!! Others are feeling bummed they're not quite managing to stay off the sauce yet, some are experiencing glimpses of wonderful FREEDOM from the evil clutches of alcohol, others are feeling glum like not drinking means they're missing out on all the fun.. and some are just ordinary - not particularly high or low - just ordinary.

I'm probably one of those last types right now. I've come through my slumpy-phase and can feel myself slowly lifting up again. Eating better, feeling the old 'gritty attitude' return.

Where-ever you're at it's ok. Relapse is often a part of recovery (so the experts tell me) so if your sobriety journey is beginning in a stop-start manner don't fret. Just keep being honest with yourself and talking it out with others here and reading, reading, reading lots of other people's journeys in the blogs down the left hand side of this page.

Getting sober is the ultimate in self-care and I often forget that I need to keep up with other self-care habits I've had in place for the last 3 years. For me it's little things like starting every day with a nice mug of my favorite Green Tea with Mandarin - that sends a message to me that I'm on the right track for the day. And I'm swearing off the floury/sugary foods again because when I do that I always feel loads better (body and mood).

There's a section on the new website (only about a week away now - yay!) called 'Sober Toolbox' where we can all share our tips and tricks for sober self-care. Here's a sneak peak of what it'll look like...


I'm sure once we all start contributing to it it'll be full of wonderful wisdom and great ideas. Things like yummy drink alternatives, different ways of explaining our not-drinking to friends and family, re-framing the reward concept, favorite sober treats, how best to get through the witching hour, how best to deal with tricky emotions... etc etc… I can't wait to see it grow and get some good ideas from y'all.

Have I mentioned lately how much I love being sober? I LOVE BEING SOBER! I love it heaps and heaps and heaps. I love it to the moon and back. I love it because it just feels so right. I love being a non-drinker. I love being a non-drinker more than I used to love being a drinker, and that's saying something because I really did love my wine. But no longer. That shit has no place in my life.

And now if you'll excuse me I need to go clean up some little boy mess, because that's what I do allthefuckingtime.

Love, Mrs D xxx

122 comments:

  1. Thanks for your post, I am day 8.
    I'm really excited to see the websie and know it will come at the perfect time for me and alot of people.
    I have really enjoyed being so present with my kids, I feel really guilty that for along time I have not been but I am going to have to deal with that a little later, I am not strong enough yet.
    I have been reading Alex Carr and your last comment that the shit has no place in your life is really starting to sink in with me.
    I have a little tip, maybe you know already but I found these cool drinks, Soho Mojito and there are other flavours but great for a quick option, I have mine really cold almost frozen and then crush up more ice and mint "Yum"
    Regarding Self care yup that is going to be a hard one too as I am only just learning to put mu gas mask on first but because of that out home seems alot calmer, funny how I thought things were calmer and I was less stressed when I drank, looks like completely the opposite is now happening,
    Bye and thanks from a calmer sober friend
    xx

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  2. Ups and down seem to be just a normal part of everyday life, doing without alcohol is just another addition to the roller coaster. But.... pat on the back for me. Went to a 50th last night armed with grape jucie, cranberry juice and soda water and my red neck wine glass which is so cool and got a lot of interest. Okay so I spotted the bottle of Lindaur Bubbly as it walked in the door hand and hand with someone else and yep felt that mournful pang and .................then it was over, done with and gone. I had a great night, was social and chatty, I was funny and I had a lot of laughs. And when the soda water fizzed right up in my face and down my top when I opened it I just confidently laughed it off and said "AND I'm not even drinking"!!! If I had been drinking I would've been so embarrassed. I woke up fine this morning, a little weary maybe but then I didn't get to bed until 1.30am, fully sober and feeling awesome. Going sober is great and still fun.

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    1. So good! Well done u! Yep lindauer was my thing too! Was wondering how u were going last night. Isn't sober laughter the best - I love that saying from mrs D's book.

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    2. Thanks Squizzi, sober laughter. Awesome. And the confidence I got from alcohol - well turns out it was there anyway. Awesome. So today I am hoping to catch up with a friend and tell her of my new status with alcohol. The last time I took a break it didn't go so well with her so I'm a bit nervous. Here's hoping for a more positive response. Told another friend at the 50th in the course of conversation and she was interested in why [not judgemental] it was great. She said no big deal, dont' have to do it anyway. Cool.

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  3. Funny! Love love love your realness. Makes me laugh out loud. I too love love love being sober. 6 weeks today or as I like to say heading into week 7. I was walking with a girlfriend and broke the news to her that this dry July was not a temporary thing and she was SHOCKED! I tried to explain it to her without sounding like I was a raving alchie (my at home habits are quite frankly nobodies business!) and so I explained that "you know how you feel after that first glass of wine well that's how I feel all the time (give or take the odd mood swing in both directions) and it's bloody great!" Me at 10.00 on a Saturday morning is particularly good as I would be normally walking around desperate for tea, coffee, food and Panadol and not really thinking anything of it. Now I am buzzing around, been up for a couple of hours already planning the day, cooking my hubbie and son a lovely brekkie before the soccer game and revelling in the knowledge that I feel ten times better than I would if I had consumed my usual intake of one and a bit bottles of wine the night before. It is especially exquisite if my husband or dear friend has a hangover!!!!

    Like many on this blog I am sure we are all coming to the end of Dry July and deciding whether to carry on with this lifestyle or not. I for one did not intend for it to be permanent and I find that statement too hard to deal with at the moment. So what I do feel comfortable with is saying I am remaining alcohol free for the foreseeable future and I will see where it takes me - and I am thriving with this change and look forward to the future benefits that slowly starting to raise their heads such as clear eyes, improved health, better finances and weight lose. Just imagine what our lives will look like in 5 or 6 months time!

    So as the end of July nears we have decisions to make. I for one have made mine and now it's time to slowly break to our inner circle, then slowly expand it as the situation arises. Good luck everyone! Exciting times. I really do think mrs d you have started a revolution!

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    1. A longtime overdueJuly 28, 2014 at 10:33 AM

      I share your joy and your thoughts. I cannot say forever just yet either but I can say one day at a time and I am almost at no booze Sun-Thurs with confidence, this (non-July) Fri and Sat will be interesting but will tackle that when it comes. Yay Mrs D for sure!

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    2. Morning, Squizzi, and everone else. That comment about explaining why you want to give up without sounding like the worst alcoholic is so true, and you are so right, there is no requirement to reveal home truths, thats for me and my family. But what do you say to an enthusiastic drinker whose first comment is: but you dont have a problem, I think what they mean is that we dont have a problem. But my problem is mine, so frustrating when you have to justify your choice, and hard too. Thanks, it obviously is a common situation.
      Good on all of you who help me help myself.

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  4. Mrs D, I'm so glad you're feeling better, eating well and taking care and drinking your green tea an doing all the stuff that makes you feel well. I love being sober too! Even when it's hard or there are pangs or it's kind of sucky, it's always a better way for me to live. Hooray you for getting such momentum going for all of us! Careful, don't walk on the lego! xo

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  5. Hey Mrs D. This is 17/1. When I see one of your blogs dropping into my inbox I feel my spirits lift. I really needed them the last few days as I had lost my sparkle completely over not drinking. I love your lack of dogma, your inclusiveness, joyfulness,courage and open vulnerablity...crying in bookshops and all.

    I have no idea where anyone gets the idea that you are showy-offy or any of those other unpleasant things you mentioned. I guess they were just having a bad day. In fact your wonderful warmth and kindness seem to spring from a place that is a just the reverse of being showy-off, just honest and open.

    So excited about the website. Good luck, good luck GOOD LUCK, In fact GOOD LUCK to everyone who is trying to get your drinking habits straight ...however you are trying to do it and wherever you are in the trying.

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  6. Just LOVE LOVE LOVE it that you love being sober. It's so awesome having you and others out there telling the rest of us that there is some real joy and awesomeness ahead of us. Yay. Glad too you are feeling better. Go you xx

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  7. I am loving being sober too - day 12 - never thought I could do day 2 - being sober is everything I thought it wouldn't be! Thirty years of pouring wine down my neck I thought it would be like losing an arm and a bloody leg - how wrong can you be! There's no more stupid drunk arguments about nothing with hubby, I have more time, I feel as though I am worth something and not just that lush who gets pissed every night, I feel proud and happy in my skin, and its thanks hugely to you Mrs D and all the wonderful people on here - xx

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    1. Oh I so get this post. Drunken arguments about nothing. Hubby only Had to look at me the wrong way and I would be off! Well done. I have just done day 3. Cherie xx

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  8. Not a good week for me! Drinking less but not able to quit completely. I am continuing to read books and blogs etc but I always seem to lead a stressful life. I also have a severe visual impairment and I am unable to drive and this really isolates me. I would LOVE to hop in a car and escape my surroundings as I am sure many of you can. I have a good job and walk to work but the last thing I want to do is more walking when I get home! I feel trapped with few friends. I have joined clubs of various sorts in the past but I have quit. I can't wait for the new website! Tomorrow I'll try harder! Love you all out there! Xx

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    1. Hi Noelle. Know that you are NOT alone. There are so many of us reading this blog, who are on the same bloody hard journey as you. Booze is shockingly addictive. It messes with your mind and your body. It takes over. The first few drinks are fine, and then the addiction takes over and you can't stop. But keep reminding yourself of what you felt like next morning. Shit, I expect. Don't worry about tomorrow. Just focus on today. Bookmark Mrs D's site on your phone, and read the comments when you get time at work, and when you feel that bloody shit booze stuff taking over. You CAN do this Noelle!! xx

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    2. Hugs to you Noelle - you are not alone! We are all here to help each other - tomorrow is a brand spanking new day for each of us xx one day at a time

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    3. Hi Noelle,last week was not a good week for me either but we just need to keep trying, Never give up and it is great we can all be here for each other.

      Cherie xx

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    4. Thank you you very cool supportive people out there! I love you. You are sooo right about the addictive thing taking over! My husband expects me just to Snap out of it and choose not to drink but that's just not possible.my inability to give up makes me feel worse! I wish I was anywhere except at this present point in time. X

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    5. My husband thought the same way for a long time. It is simply he didn't understand that I was not like him and could take it or leave it! Keep on going. I have just posted a blog too. I find the more you read as Mrs D says the more you feel like you are not alone and it takes you out of yourself. Cherie xx

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  9. Im with you there nancypants, drinking was my life, god how bloody stupid were we! Im never gonna touch the shit ever again. We can all push through this addiction together. So proud to be sober. Drinking is not an option!! Stay strong all x

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    1. Mine too - all i ever did was get pissed after work - only days I had off were the ones when I was too hungover - this little refuge on here gives me strength to try and keep saying no to the booze xx

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    2. Same here.My world revolved around 4pm wine oclock.Every single day.I wouldn't consider an evening event unless I could drink.One week behind me now.Less stupid bickering with my man and more focus towards the kids.My man still drinks and I don't find that easy to watch but I have to make this about me.Good on all of us xx

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  10. Hi Mrs D and Friends. I sooo look forward to your posts Mrs D. What you write is so uplifting and I love your honesty. You are so far down the track, and those of us who have just started (Day 7) get so much inspiration from your words, your experience and your wisdom. And believe me, we feel your discomfort too. That’s what so great about this blog. We are all on a journey. Some at the beginning. Some are well underway. But we all have the same thing in common – to put our boozing behind us and take control of our lives!
    As far as Dry July is concerned. I tried a Dry May. For no other reason than I was concerned about my drinking. I did very well. But 1 June arrived, and with it, the lies, deceit, hidden bottles, and secret boozing started all over again. Oh, those shitty hangovers that started about 11.00 at night, when the boozing high had become the boozing low. With my wife looking at me and wondering what the hell was going on. She thought I'd only had a couple of drinks. Yeah right. That's why I call myself in the garage - that's where I hid it and that’s where I did it.
    In so many ways my Dry May was a waste of time. Then I saw you on TV Mrs D. And you turned my life around. Well, for the last 7 days anyway. So what about tomorrow? Well, as we all know, tomorrow never comes. I have been dry all day today. And for me, that’s all that matters.
    So to those Dry July contributors. You don’t have to think about a Dry August, or a Dry September. Just focus on a Dry Today. That’s all you have today. A very specific short term goal. A Dry Today. And if it gets hard, and it will, just remind yourself of what you used to feel like the next morning! Shit probably. Love to you all.

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    1. I love this idea. A dry today. I thought about it on my way to work this morning. It sounds so simple and calming when things get tough. Thanks for the wisdom :)

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  11. High fives all round. Yay for us: those who are doing so well and those who are struggling but haven't given up trying. Sobriety rocks. I'm not going to be humble here - I'm shouting it from the rooftops. Had a fabulous moment late last night - nearly midnight, when my phone rang and it was my teenage daughter - heart stopped until I heard the smile in her voice and knew everything was OK. The party she was at had not gone quite as planned and sleepover plans had also fallen apart so she had to be collected. "No worries" I said with a smile as I leapt out of bed and grabbed the car keys. "I'm on my way". Mum to the rescue. Simply couldn't have happened before. I'm loving the new sober me. Loving reading that other people are finding so much joy in sobriety as well, and grateful for all the support. Mrs D you are a role model and a saviour!

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    1. Have had a similar thing happen with my daughter too. Found it a real buzz being able to do it.
      Well done you

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    2. Just being able to pick them up from school sober is a buzz. I am working on that but I too have had a occassion a few weeks back where my teenage daughter phoned me in the middle of the night and I went and picked her up. She would normally phone her dad and ask him if I had been drinking (which is more often than not) and if so he would pick her up. She asks him everyday when he picks her up on his way home from work if I have been drinking.

      Cherie xx

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  12. Yesterday I went to the pub with 20 mates before heading to the football at the stadium foe a double header and I didn't touch anything stronger than a tomato juice all day and night where normally I would have been half sloshed by the time I got to the stadium. I had great conversations all day with those around me, remembered both games and was happy being sober even with others that weren't around me.
    Stupidly though walking past the bar at the train station on my way home by myself I was tempted to go in for a drink as my mind told me no one would know...... I then thought of the hard work I had done so far and pushed myself onto the train and arrived home sober. This brought home that this is not a quick fix and is something I will have to work on and battle for along time. Thankfully I have this blog and everyone in it to help me stay focused.
    Than you

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    1. Well done Martin!. There is no quick fix and people who know you will always know when you have picked up a drink. Keep going. It is interesting watching people who are drinking and listening to their conversations become more and more illogical, louder, repetitive the more they drink. It shows me what I am like when I drink. I am on day too again but have found this blog and many others helpful.

      Cherie xx

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    2. Thanks Cherie, yea I agree with you. It has made me look at myself as to how I was when I was drunk. The conversations, actions and behavior. Remembering conversations from the night before is a huge plus of being sober. Hope your day 3 is going well

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    3. Thanks Martin my day 3 went well and I managed to be sober. Congratulations on day 50.

      Cherie xx

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  13. Hi Lotta, How true this post is. I always find that all the comments are really helpful and the interaction with others is amazing. People we don't know from a bar of soa help each other. Goodness me, you have helped and supported me since I have been blogging (after your inspirational TV apperance). I have also got some really lovely cyber friends who are now not only commenting but are emailing support as well. It is fantastic and yes there is a revolution and I know it will help me get sober. Back to day 2 again but that is OK because tomorrow will be day 3 because I have planned not to fail rather than not planning and failing! I am so looking forward to your website and I will be signing up as another tool to help me achieve sobriety, Well done. I laughed at your last line "I need to go clean up some little boy mess, because that's what I do allthefuckingtime". I have big boys (husband and son) and two messy teenage girls and I feel like I am cleaning their mess allthefuckingtime too. LOL :)

    Cherie xx

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  14. We'll I was called on twice tonight and so pleased that I hadn't consumed my usual bottle of wine. First my husband ring from work asking to be collected as the vehicle has shat itself (groan - more money) then tonight my teenage son was really struggling with study for an important exam on Tuesday so after dinner I sat with him and turned it into a fun game thing and 2 hours later he had it Sussed. So happy to go to bed and hear him singing to himself out load. He had been so worried and had basically given up cos he thought he was plain dumb at this subject. He is not dumb gorgeous the record so made my heart sink to see this coming out. A couple of months ago I wouldn't have been able to do either of these things. It's the little things that make this all worth it eh

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  15. Hi Mrs D. I love what you said about being sober being the ultimate in self care, and that you are starting your day with habits that reinforce your commitment to take care of yourself. since being sober I start my day with the gym and/or meditation (and coffee - not quite up to green tea). I did these things before also - but always with a slightly sore head and a feeling of tiredness that stayed with me during the day. Why the heck did I do that to myself for so long. Now the thought of having a day like that is so abhorrent it is more than enough to keep me off the plonk. Now the core feeling that stays with me all day is that of feeling more present and happier than I have in years. I drove out to a 50th birthday party on Saturday reflecting on how happy I feel. And I too feel that is reflected in my household being generally happier (I'm at the teenage children stage of life also -and it is great to know it is not a problem to go and pick them up - it used to piss me off that their social life interfered with my drinking time - now I can't believe I thought like that!). I didn't have a problem at all not drinking at the party. A new-ish friend that really isn't much of a drinker, and no one else seemed to be either - I would have felt like a drunken fool if I'd bought my old slightly lush-like
    self to the party. Also loved waking up non-hung-over, the novelty is still exciting after a month. :)

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  16. Hi all, Mrs D, thanks for all the inspiration. I have to say I love this being sober as well. I am about to start week 8 - wow ! Go me :) I had a couple of test the last week that I thought could be an issue and I flew through unscathed, the first my hairdresser believe it or not, I am usually offered a glass of wine, but I actually took my own cranberry and raspberry teabag ! Lol. Thank goodness she is a friend of mine. The other was to the football double header in Welly and I usually have a couple of wines with a friend, but she is a normal drinker and wasn't drinking, made it soo much easier, but to be honest I would have been fine even if she had had a drink. One of my biggest ways of getting through is I love going to be in the evening to nice comfy bed stone cold sober and knowing I will wake up with no form of a hangover what so ever. Back into reading a couple of chapters of a book each night instead of passing out !
    Thank you Mrs D and all the others here, you are all an inspiration. Keep up the good work, even to those who think they may not making too much progress, the fact that you coming to these blogs means you are still with us and you will know when the time is right for you - keep strong

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    1. Oh my goodness, my counting is so off its not funny !! LOL.... I am not starting week 8, but week 6 !!!!! Wishfull thinking ! Ha ha ha ha

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    2. Oh my god you are so right. Going to bed sober on these lovely cold nights (me - I preheat the bed and delight in snuggling in) and waking up the next morning after such a heavy sleep. It is heaven isn't it? The sleeps... No more 3am insomnia fretting and worrying and watching the clock and then feeling tired all day. Waking up feeling happy and revitalised. My family must be noticing the change. I certainly am. I can't remember the last time I was this happy!! I love the way mrs d is so enthusiastic about sobriety. It is very infectious. Thank you Lotta! U rock!

      Loved ur last blog about the cleaning up. Have found myself swearing a bit lately and hubbie turned and looked at me the other day as I used ur F word and I replied " it's mrs D's fault I have her vocab stuck in my brain". He laughed and said he loves mrs d and to keep carrying on. He has even started reading the posts which is cool. Even my teenage son will walk past and see me on the I pad and say "how's mrs d?!!!!!" Funny. He's only 13.

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  17. New here, first comment. Thanks so much for your wonderful blog. I'm starting Day 11 and still on such a high! I'm so excited for my accomplishment, yet it phases no one else, they are clueless. I love knowing I'm not alone and that the online community is here to help. I'm almost finished reading your blog (it's been days now), look forward to reading your book, and am excited about your new website, and hope to become a part of it. You've motivated me to write (I'm crummy at it) but I'm giving it a go. Thanks for being a "real" person.

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    1. Hi Knitting Sober. Day 11. Good on you. And don't think you're writing is crummy, because it's not. The more you read the blogs, the more you'll want to write. It's contagious. It's addictive. Like the booze, but in a good way!!

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    2. Hi Knitting Sober, I agree with above. One of the things I love about all this is that people write honestly and what they are thinking. It's easy to relate to and feel at home with. So welcome to posting comments.

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    3. Just write and write. Welcome to blogging and well done in day 11.

      Cherie xx

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  18. Good sober morning to you Mrs D and Friends!
    Day 8. Enjoying a hangover free coffee. I’m sort of retired but still doing some part time work. Wifey is working today, so I’ll have to make sure I keep myself busy. Vacuuming is on my list. Oh joy. Nice start to the day up here, so a walk is on the plan for the ‘affo. And I have a roast planned for tea. The challenge there of course will be to lay off the booze while I’m preparing it. For me, cooking and boozing go hand in hand. So this is my promise to you, that I shall stay off the booze today. And if I don’t, I will tell you tomorrow. But I’m not too bothered about tomorrow. I’m just focusing on today. ☺

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    1. Yes cooking and having a glass of wine on the bench goes hand in hand... But not tonight! Yay! Day I again for me!

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    2. Well done Inthegarage. I hope your day 8 went well.

      Cherie xx

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  19. Go for it inthegarage66. I use to like a drink while cooking so now I have in a nice wine or cider glass either just water or cranberry and soda water. It works.

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  20. I can so relate you you about the cooking.I love to cook,eat and drink.The whole business of it was my delight.Dinner parties,wine flowing great ( I thought) conversation.Now I am 8 days sober and just a wee bit tearful and watery.I cooked a big family roast dinner last night and watched Mr have luscious red wine while I had boring water.It sucked.Cleaned up fast and off to bed with me.Another day done.Keep strong out there xx

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  21. I was dry 4 weeks which is a huge achievement and made me feel great. Like many people commenting here and what Lotta said, Its great being sober. I totally agree. I love sobriety...When I can manage it. But that's not always possible. I have to be totally focused on staying sober because I can easily slip if I put myself in sticky situations. People, Places and Things. That's one of warnings you get at AA. It means certain situations, certain people, certain things have powerful positive associations around drinking behavior and will threaten your sobriety. So Unlike Lotta, and many other sober drunks, I can't really put myself in situations where alcohol is being consumed. Not in a party situation anyway. And I can't associated with people who I once drunk with. Because I can't say NO to them. I automatically switch into this denial-mode and pretend it will be different this time (it never is). The fact is the compulsions are too strong and I can't control my thinking when temptations in the form of People Places and Things exist. All the symptoms of my addiction become apparent and overwhelm me. I live and drink in wellington and have a long checkered history of drunkenness in this city.
    -- A Binge Drinker.

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    1. Hi Anonymous. I guess for me it's about constantly reminding myself of what I felt like the next day. I felt like SHIT! And what my boozing was doing to my lovely wife of almost 40 years, my kids, myself, and my health. Come 5.00 I need to be really strong and remind myself that alcohol is addictive shit. That I can NEVER stop at one glass, and the only thing to do is to not drink the fucking stuff today. Just today. Always today. I didn't have to drink. I chose to drink. And I have the power to choose to stop. And so can you. It's bloody hard, but we can do this Anonymous! XX

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  22. hey sober friends getting through 2day is a toughy my dear brothers birthday who passed away earlier this year he would be 49 today. I really it the booze hard the last 5 months after his death, im 30 days sober 2day what a gift 4 him. I know he is with me on this journey pushing me through. Life is so precious, and without this blog and support i dont think i could get through this day.. thank you

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    1. Your brother will be so thrilled with what you are doing. You are so right. Life is precious. Far to precious to stuff it up with booze, booze, booze. Because that's what we do. We knock it back like there's no tomorrow. We are not normal drinkers. We have to accept that, support one another, and stop bloody drinking. Shit it feels good to be sober! xx

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  23. I have a question - I am at Day 28 today and I am just feeling so emotional. I had a friend be a bit rude to me this morning and I still feel really upset about it. I actually feel like crying right now and I am not even sure why. I thought not drinking would make me feel BETTER and all I feel at the moment is sad and lonely. Should it be like this??

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    1. Hi Ella

      We all have better days and worse days. The booze helps to dull all sorts of emotions and sometimes we hide behind it. Taking it away does leave us more exposed.

      Dealing with the emotions is a part of learning to live booze-free. It can be a bit of a rollercoaster, especially in the beginning, but think about all the positives of not drinking. What have you gained? A fair bit I'd say. For me there's well over a dozen things, including my self-respect, clear head, lots more time, remembering what happened last night when I wake up, money I haven't spent, etc.

      It might help if you can figure out what's behind what you're feeling (hormones? something that happened? just down?) and find some coping strategies (coffee with a friend, a walk, a bubble bath, nice music, write a diary, take up a craft, paint, a good book?) If it's really bad or ongoing or you are in a dark place you might find it useful to talk to a counsellor or even just your family doctor? Either way, adding drink to the emotions just makes it two problems instead of one. Sending lots of hugs your way.

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    2. Hi Ella. What you are feeling is absolutely natural. Remever that booze is an incredibly addictive drug. It takes hold of your brain, your mind, your emotions, your body, and very effecively and efficiently drags you down to dark places. Keep reminding yourself of just how shit you felt after a bout of drinking. How much it stuffed your life around, and stay strong!! Booze is shit Ella, and we don't need it. We can do this Ella. We can do this TODAY. xx

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    3. I think Mrs D said once in one of her Blogs that one of the hard things was confronting your thoughts now that you are sober. This has been so true for me, my thoughts and emotions have been so much clearer and to start with a real roller coaster as I found ways to deal with the down times other than turning to the bottle as I used to. Have just passed 50 days today, and while those struggles in my head haven't gone completely, it is easier, and as others ave said completely normal.

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    4. Hi Ella I have a teenage daughter with mild depression and she finds body balance at the gym great. It is a mixture of yoga and Pilates and whenever she is feeling overwhelmed or down she takes herself off to a class. Maybe worth a try and also just a sime brisk walk especially if u have a frosty but sunny morning can work wonders. Other little tips like picking some flowers or blossoms and putting in a little vase on ur kitchen bench can just make u feel good. We have all been there I am sure at one time or another and yes it does get better. My turning point was about 3 to 4 weeks when I suddenly felt inexplicably happy!

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  24. Hi Mrs D and friends. Bit of a challenge coming up this afternoon. My lovely wife, who has no idea how much booze I used to put away (12 units a night. 4 or 5 or 6 nights a week – shithead that I was). Anyway, my lovely wife is very partial to gew├╝rztraminer. What a stupid name. Wifey is a normal drinker – one glass and that’s enough. Screw the top back on, and have another glass later in the week. Unlike me. Screw the top on? Yeah, right. Screw it off more like. Down the hatch, and don’t forget the other bottle in the garage!
    So, my challenge is to buy her a bottle of that stuff with the silly name above, and not touch it myself. Because I’m in love with the stuff. I’m in love with the taste, the texture, the smell, the colour, the effect. I love everything about the stuff. Until the next morning. Which is when shit really does happen. Oh, and sorry booze, but I have just broken off my love affair with you. Piss off. Wifey, bless her, has no idea what I’m going through. But you know, my fellow bloggers. And that keeps me strong. And accountable.
    I’ll let you know later tonight how I get on. Fingers and toes crossed.

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    1. I am sure that at some supermarkets and liquor stores, you can get small bottles. Maybe look for a small bottle that would only serve one person? The 185mL or 375mL kind. Or - after she has had hers, just tip the rest down the sink.

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    2. Good luck with the evening Inthegarage..... it is tough holding back the whole truth of your feelings, and what you are going through. When I started hiding bottles I felt terrible, and that was the reason I sought help, medically, and from my partner. Because as you are in love with the taste, so am I.. I can't get that out of my head at times. Good luck with tonight, and maybe you will let her know a little more about the troubles you are going through. You never know it may help both of you..

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    3. I love how Mrs D points out time and again, not drinking is NOT about what you are losing but what you are GAINING inthegarage. Your self-respect. Your wife's respect. Clear head. Health. Not wasting money. Time that just disappeared into drinking before ... list is endless. You don't say why you need to buy your wife gewurtz - maybe you could settle for something non-alcoholic (roses, choc, etc) - but maybe she has asked you to for a reason. I buy wine for my hubby - but always before noon so it's way away from my previous drinky-time. I pour him a glass, even sniff it, but won't touch it. By thinking about what I'm gaining, not what I'm losing, I manage to get past wanting a sip. And although I have cravings, they usually pass in a few minutes. Oh - and I pour myself a large soda and lime in a wineglass before I pour anything for him. Mrs D talks about stem withdrawal too - I think having a wine glass helps. Stay strong! You can do it. You really don't like the place you've been and it's obvious you want to change that. Go you!

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    4. Wow what awesome advise from u guys above. Thinking of u in the garage. I think bring honest takes courage yes but the support once ur lovely wife knows will outweigh the initial shame of telling her. As above u gain so much and what u don't miss is the deception - time that was my biggie and my reason for changing. No more in the garage drinking. Thinking of u. Hope it went well

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  25. I hear you inthegarage I hear you loud and clear - you CAN do this, I am in your space right now having this internal conversation of fuck it - bad day at work - friend just pissed me right off and it's Soooooo bloody tempting to go grab a bottle and neck it - witching hour as well - I will not let IT in! Be strong!!! X

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  26. Well said Nancy Pants.... be strong and try and ignore that little voice urging us to break our will... as hard as it is at times, and tempting..... Don't let it beat you, stay in control.... good luck to you all - you give me the strength to carry on

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    1. Thanks Martin - I did it! Drive past the bottle shop! Another tiny victory - like Mrs D says - these moments do pass

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    2. Well done Nancy.. that deserves a wee happy dance... great stuff.. small steps are the best

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    3. :) thanks Martin. It's funny I was just reading your earlier post about going to the stadium, we all have these weak brittle moments and we are all different - when, who with, things that trigger them - like Mrs D says we have to learn to recognise them and we CAN deal with them - little steps for us all :) feeling good 13 days -

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    4. Well done on day 13 Nancy..... yea we all have our weak points. And I do beat myself up trying to work out how and why I can be strong and deal with it easily one moment and then crumble like a chocolate flake the next. Recognising those moments is important, and I just have to live within those boundaries eh.

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  27. Hi folks. Well I did it. Sort of. By default! I bought wifey a bottle of this Givertz stuff. Chilled. Looks great. Wine time arrived at 5.00.
    I put the bottle out, with wine glass and said “This is for you, dear.”
    “Oh that’s nice. But what will you drink?” she asks.
    “Oh,” says I. “I’m OK. I’ll just have a glass of ginger ale.” “Mmm,” she says. “That sounds nice. Can I have some please?”
    So the screw cap stayed on the bottle. You gotta laugh!! I guess I’ll face the challenge tomorrow.
    But hang on, how can a normal, mature adult look at a lovely, luscious bottle of wine and not open it!? Is that abnormal, or what? Well, actually Mr inthegarage, that is normal. It’s what you’ve been doing that’s not normal. Normal people don’t hide booze in the garage. Normal people sip one glass, and are happy with that. Truth to tell, I’ll never be a normal drinker. And that’s why I’ve stopped.
    Anyways, I got through today, and that’s what it’s all about. ☺

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    1. AWESOME! Well done! Another day done for us both!!

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    2. Well done, great work and another day ticked off..

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    3. You did it!! Yay. Keep on doing it man.

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    4. Sometimes "default" just steps in to help. Well done! Stay strong! You'll have to start stashing ginger ale in the garage for when you need an "out"!

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    5. Was starting to worry about you inthegarage ! Glad you checked in and all is well! :)

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    6. Hi inthegarage. I was not/am not ready to fully "come out" to my family yet, but I found I needed an "excuse" to not drink. I told them I'd been shoulder-tapped by a colleague to sign up for Dry July (which I did), and then hit them up for sponsorship. I also said as I had only found out about DJ in the middle of the month, I have to carry on till mid August at least to satisfy myself that I'm not short changing any sponsors. Maybe if you're quick you can sign up quickly too :-) Funny how sometimes it's hardest to tell those close to you.

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  28. Hi Mrs D,

    It is funny how our journeys are do different.

    I know you are only joking when you say you have to go and clean up after your boys because thatsallyoudoallthefuckingtime, but I lost that right when I quit drinking, because I got divorced. As a 'sometimes' Dad I would love to clean up after him more than I do.

    Isn't it strange how sobriety pulled my old family apart, caused my untold amounts of pain, and yet I still wouldn't exchange having my old family back in return for a life back on the sauce.

    Keep up the good work.

    Lee

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  29. Good morning team! Day 9 dawns, and sobriety awaits. Thanks for all the positive feedback. It’s so good to know we are all supporting each other. I’ll be a lot quieter on the blog today (who said, about time?!). Am doing some paid work to supplement my pension. But not so I can buy booze! Home later this afternoon, when I’m sure I’ll have something to contribute. No surprises there. I’ll keep you posted re the Givertz. Looking forward to watching Nigel Latta on TV tonight. Seems 2 drinks a day = 5 ciggies a week. Yet another reason to quit.
    Oh, and by the way. I promise to be sober today, and to smile and laugh lots. ☺

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    1. Well done you! How great is it to be rid of the drink and all the rubbish that comes with it? Chin up, soldier on ... you're an inspiration to those around you.

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  30. Yes coming to the end of Dry July and I really want to continue on Dry today every day, but it's not me I need to convince its all my friends and family that will be shocked and i can just hear them all "are you serious?" It's interesting that it seems to be other people have power over you like that and I do worry about other people, but I have to be stronger than that and just say F#ck it!! I'm going to do this, one day at a time Dry today, I love it!

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    1. You and I are in exactly the same boat. I am coming to the end of Dry July and in fact there have been drinks planned on Friday night and part of the invitation said, "And it's the end of Dry July so Ella will be able to have a wine with us!". Pressure, much?! Sadly, none of my friends are in the same boat as me. We have to just be strong. Our true friends will accept our decision. And after the others have had a few wines, hopefully they won't even notice what I am doing. If it gets too bad, I'll just feign illness and leave.

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    2. I can recognise the same pattern in one or two of my friends but you can't persuade them to do it they have to want to do it on their own accord. One of my oldest and dearest friends who i haven't seen a lot of over the last few years, has been a non drinker since she was 18yrs old - after a pushy guy at a party tried to take advantage of her just because she was drunk & that was enough to put her off for life! I have had lots of one times of drunken episodes over my life that I have said the next morning "I'm never drinking again" but I still went back for more. My friend was a faster learner than me!
      So I guess I will be attracting the friends in my life that support me and my decision and if the others don't like it well, you will soon know who you're true friends are.

      One thing I have discovered over Dry July, is that my sense of humour kicks in even more so during social occassions and ppl laugh and I just say see I don't need alcohol to have a laugh still have my sense of humour. They can't argue with that! :) E

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    3. Hang in there Anonymous and Ella. And hang on to how you feel now being sober, take those feelings with you into situations. I told a friend recently, basically I said I love drinking, I love wine but I was loving it to much and I didn't like that so I took charge of me. Do your friends actually know how you feel about your drinking? It may be that your staying strong and moving from Dry July to dry daily is normal may be a huge support for them. They may feel about their drinking as you do about yours. I have my drinks in wine glasses still. To your friends say I love you, and I really appreciate your support. Thanks.

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    4. Thank you Breezi's Spirit, great words of support too :) E

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    5. A longtime overdueJuly 29, 2014 at 11:50 AM

      At the weekend, I confided in my friend, who is now quite excited to have a non-drinking partner. She is a take it or leave it girl, who has imbibed due to social pressure. You might be lucky enough to find the same in one of your friends. Someone who just needs someone else to get them off the hook.

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  31. They say you have to reach rock bottom sometimes.. That was me yesterday absolutely shameful drunken rock bottom. My poor 6 year old asked me mummy why are you walking funny? A well my darling daughter is because your mother has just polished of a bottle of wine and have lost control of her balance and is now stumbling around contemplating her next drink... So I had the middle of the night quilt trip lying in bed awake in the morning hours feeling super shit and pathetic and hoping one day my kids will have a sober mum and hopefully they will be to young now to remember this drunk version of her. It all ends here!! I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired and frankly I have run out of excuses to drink/binge. Thanks for you Mrs D I can actually contemplate the thought of a life without booze without being seen as socially awkward. I don't even have one friend who does not drink. This is going to be so hard but here I go.. wish me luck.. DAY 1

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    1. Anonymous, I won't wish you luck, luck has nothing to do with it. I wish you all the love, strength, support, courage, humour, wisdom and understanding you need. Go forth for yourself and then your daughter. Happy first day.

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    2. A longtime overdueJuly 29, 2014 at 11:40 AM

      Go you! It is that startling realisation that is the first step in the right direction. Read this blog from the start, it will help. This path isn't easy, drinking wine is heaps easier but hold onto this blog and that ghastly thought of your daughter seeing you again. Hang in there girl. One day at a time.

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  32. Im in the same boat im gettin freaked out bout what im gonna say nearing the end of july. Got a house warming sat night and im not sure im ready or strong enough to handle a drinking situation yet. Also ive always drunk with these girls , thats what we do. Ive got all week 2 mull it over before i make a decision. As for today im clean and sober and thats good.. stay strong everyone :)

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    1. A longtime overdueJuly 29, 2014 at 11:46 AM

      Maybe we need to hook up a charity for Dry August? Pulled the Dry July excuse last night myself, makes it so easy. Thinking I might say that I want to see how long I can stay off it just out of interest. Or that I still need to pay off the jacket I just bought with my wine money.

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    2. Me too - Dry July's a great excuse. Now I'm also looking for another. Think I may just say I've realised how many calories the wine is and staying off for a while to try and keep my weight in check. Or might just front up and shock everyone with the truth :-) The thought of the looks on their faces is quite fun to imagine.

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  33. Today I have a bad case of gout and can't put any weight on my foot..... I thought all these ailments were meant to go away when I stopped drinking the booze.'.... thank god for a nice warm cuppa & commonwealth games replay's..... deep breath and get on with my day

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  34. Dry July has been abysmal for me. I announced to the world I was participating, yet not one day in July was alcohol free for me and not one of my friends has made comment. I'm not sure whether that reflects on them or on me, but I suspect the latter. For months I have been unhappy with my state but I can't quite cross the line to the other side. I have consulted a Psych yet
    I feel very alone with this one. Soooo looking forward to the release of a sober toolbox.

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    1. Don't read to much into what has or hasn't happened here. Just as people don't know what goes on inside our head we don't know what goes on inside theirs or what their struggles are. Going sober is about you, for you and by you. First and foremost you matter, it's a case of mattering to yourself first and then others. You are so not alone. Reflect on all of July, has it all been abysmal or is it possible that there have been some high spots...have you done July thus far alcohol free? if yes, yay you!! And what else might have happened that was positive and good. Keep posting, it helps.

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    2. Dry July was abysmal because not one day was alcohol free - total failure. I had some lovely times in July and I'm a positive thinking person, however I am choosing not to carry this weight on my shoulder any longer. I'm struggling to find the right support structure for the change.

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    3. Oh I'm sorry. I spent months deciding each day enough was enough and I was stopping and each time I brought another bottle and filled up my glass. Then one day I didn't. Why, buggered if I know. I wish I knew what the magic trick was. But I believe it exists in all of us and I believe you will find it. Good on you for positive thinking, choosing not to carry this weight and looking for the right help.

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    4. A longtime overdueJuly 29, 2014 at 11:44 AM

      That self loathing is a very good sign that you are about to jump on the right path. One day at at time. Start today. Then start again tomorrow. Read this blog from the start, it helps. Keep close to this site and focus on the shit consequences of drinking eg broken sleep, foggy head. The battle will be in the mind not to pick up the glass (which looks, smells and tastes so good) but it is the effects we hate. Remember the effects. Small steps. Go girl, you can do this. If I can, you can.x

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  35. Ms Penelope DroppedJuly 29, 2014 at 11:46 AM

    Hey dudes, Day 8.

    No desire to drink medicinal looney juice. Just enjoying doing all the 'work' on myself that has needed doing since I was 10.

    Have had a challenging morning.

    Standing up to hubby and business partner. We have a political hoarding on the fence outside one of our workshops that hubs doesn't like. I get that. He wanted me to ring and harass landlords and the MP in question and get it taken down. I'm very political don't get me wrong but I thought...no that's your gig, you stick your neck out buddy. I would have rung a street artist friend of ours and got him to use the canvas as a starting point rather than waste the hoarding....but that's my gig.

    Then not five minutes later I find myself ringing 111 after a man exposing himself to me as I walk to work.

    Bad move buddy I think. I spin round, furious..."Oi motherf*cker! Who the f*ck do you think you are?! How DARE you do that to me you piece of shit! F*ck you!!"..

    I walk on a few paces then think. Fuck it. That doesn't wash with me. I call 111 and spin on my heal and follow the guy. "You are going to regret that when the police get here motherf8cker!" I shriek!! I am now stalking following this guy up the back in an industrial area...stupid....maybe. I tell the police I know you wouldn't recommend this but I'm following this guy....

    Long story short. I corner this guy at the furniture shed of the St Vincent de Paul a few hundred metres from where the incident happens. He is obviously on home turf. I look at him and his two mates. It dawns on me that this guy has an intellectual disability.

    Suddenly the tables have turned. I'm reassuring this guy that despite what his friends say he won't be going to jail. The police are coming and we will deal with this like adults.

    I then spend the morning chasing Community Services, IDEA Services to find someone who will go into bat for this guy who has already confessed, is barely verbal and is probably shit scared out of his mind. I have an Autistic daughter. She's amazing but I'm under no illusion about how the world is for these guys.

    I resort to the time honoured tradition of a cup of tea. Its over an hour ago and my head is still spinning from the adrenaline. I feel shaken. A bit traumatised for various reasons. Doesn't help the the bloody guy had bright orange pubic hair like the other guy who stalked me and did this TWICE walking through the Queens Drive in Dunedin way back when I was at Art School....

    Anyhoo...hope all is well chums. I will get meself another cuppa, hope that the guy gets the help he needs and try like buggery to get the awful vision of his hideous man-parts out of my head.

    Maybe is was good he chose to victimise me. May be a turning point for him too....I can get that.

    Rock on,
    Penny

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    1. Oh my god! I love your gumption, even though it would maybe be against what the police would advise.. And best for everyone that the police did get involved. That is brave!

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    2. Ms Penelope DroppedJuly 31, 2014 at 3:31 PM

      Further to.....

      Spent an hour at the Police station yesterday as they decided to press charges.

      Turned out the guy was recidivist at this kind of behaviour. He told them he knew it was wrong and did it for the buzz. Apparently he was in possession of several "vulgar and disturbing" porn DVD's at the time.

      Okay-well that changes the scenario for me and I'm happy he will be stopped and held accountable.

      We all have rights and responsibilities, disabled or not and he has to own that shit.

      I felt like a cleansing spray down with a high pressure hose (and a beer!) after that but made do without either.

      Day 9 here however I'm not going to count anymore.

      For me knowing that I have fundamentally changed my screwed up approach to the medicinal looney juice (permanently) works for me.

      And for that I pay homage to groovy Mrs D

      Keep cool dudes,
      Penny

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  36. I LOVE being sober too. Been almost 5 months and I have to say our journeys are similar Mrs. D. I love your spirit, your energy and all the fun you continue to have during your sober journey. I've been reading your blog, I've listened to you on the Bubble Hour and I am excited to read your story. Keep talking, don't let the Debbie Downers step on your toes-they can't take your happiness away. xoxo, Lisa

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  37. Ha, was reading the information panel on the new herb tea I brought to try Wildberry, designed to soothe and stimulate in equal measure, relaxing the body and reviving the soul. Like a good wine.....................................Funny.

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  38. Hi folks. Home again. It’s good to get out and about and meet people. Much better than being cooped up inside all day. Too much time to think about that wine shit.
    Dry July – I had a Dry May. For no other reason than I wanted to see if I could do it. Well, it wasn’t actually all May. It was 3 weeks of it. 3 weeks of feeling good and proud and sober! But then it all happened again for me. So, I ask myself, what was the point of a dry 3 weeks? The mistake I made was thinking too far ahead. Thinking “I must have a dry month.” Thankfully, I have learnt from that mistake. Now I don’t think in terms of weeks or months. That time frame is too long. I simply think in terms of today. My promise to you is that I will be dry TODAY.
    I love this blog. So much support, and a few sad stories. Hang in there folks, we can beat this shit! And while the blog takes up some of my time, for me, it is an investment. Why? Because the more I put on the blog, and the more I read what the rest of you are going through, the more determined I am to drink no booze today. And if I drink no booze today, if I say NO to that addictive crap between 5.00 and 7.00, if I simply don’t start, then hey, guess what? My reward is a lovely, long sober evening!! Time with my wife, talk to my family, email friends, time to read, watch TV, browse the www., read the blog. As opposed to getting very pissed, trying to hide it from my lovely wifey, and generally losing an entire evening of my life in a drunken state.
    If you are struggling – read the blog! Read about what others are going through. And know that you are not alone!
    Oh, and I do like the “hide the ginger ale in the garage idea!” Brilliant.
    Love to you all. Be strong.

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    1. A longtime overdueJuly 30, 2014 at 9:49 AM

      So lovely to hear a man's story, I perceive most of us are women. Go you, your wife will LOVE you for it. Women need connection (hence this blog works so well for us), your wife will love the genuine (sober) re-connection.

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  39. 7.11 pm. Another dry day. Yippee!!

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  40. Yay me to!! We should all be proud of ourselves. Im begining to wonder why i drank at all because im just loving being sober... :) woo hoo!

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  41. Another sober day done - yippee - just reading all the posts about dry July - it's bizarre we shouldn't need an "excuse" NOT to drink - says a lot for our society and sad booze culture that we feel the added pressure (on top of all the other shit we are all trying to deal with by simply staying off the piss) - personally I have pretty much told all my friends & acquaintances that I no longer drink, they have been shocked, laughed and said no effing way haha what you? Not drink? Haha pull the other one - deadly serious look from me and yes I no longer drink because I have a massive problem with it, I can't put screw caps back on bottles - ever - so this is the new me take it or leave it! - without exception they have all been totally gob smacked and then supportive, not sure if my friends (dont have that many) are the exception or what but its working for me ATM and I don't feel so alone now they know the brutal truth about their former constantly pissed mate - am feeling strong today long may it last x

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  42. Go Nancy Pants! Don't it feel sooo good going to bed sober!!

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  43. Day 29 for me :) yay.(I just wanted to be comment 101 as well) Wow has this blog exploded. Supermarkets must be doing a starve. Would be nice to know where everyone is, even if you are anonymous. Keep up the good work everyone.-Hamilton

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    1. Hey anonymous why don't you give yourself a nickname so we know which anonymous you are. It's easy just choose name/URL and type a nickname in the first line, don't worry about second line. Squizzi from Hamilton too!

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  44. I sort of started a blog May 9. My plan was to stop drinking that day. It did not happen, but I did 2 days later, for a while. I am still struggling. I have some big life things making it harder. I am sure others do as well. I really need the tool box and ideas. The 1st big issue is I am separated from my husband. A divorce is in the process but stalled because neither one of us can decide to finalize it.
    On Sunday, 7/27, my sister passed away unexpectedly. I want to get thru this sober. I want to allow the feelings to happen and mourn as I should not in a stuper.

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    1. Oh you are going through some big things! I am so sorry to hear of your sister passing and a divorce is so emotional. You certainly have a lot on your plate. As a temporary measure until new website arrives google SMART recovery. It is American based so not as relatable but still good. They have a good toolbox once you get through signing up. Really looking forward to new website too.

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    2. A longtime overdueJuly 30, 2014 at 9:46 AM

      I lost a close family member on 12th July, talk about challenge dry July! To be honest I had one beer in his honour and 2 bubbles the next night in his honour. And that is it. Can I assure you that NOT loading booze in on top of all the stress and emotion is a SMART thing to do! Think of all that your body is coping with and know that adding alcohol to the mix is compromising your health. My loved one died of (liver) health issues, I don't want to join him. Lay your hands on as many non-alcs as you can - sprite zero, herbal tea, my coffee intake has increased (not ideal). One day at a time. It is bloody hard but also bloody worth it. Stay close to this site.xxx

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  45. Sorry to hear of your sisters passing and your separation its these tough times in life we really hit the booze. I lost my close brother in january and i spiralled down heavily after his death . My drinking was rapid and i got to the point i didnt care anymore. Until i saw mrs d on sunday and she gave me the courage i needed to pick up my sorry arse and make a change.ive been sober 32 days. Im grieving sober and its ok. Be strong reach out for support thru family friends and this blog. Dont pick up that first drink!! Big hugs xx

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  46. Could call it "Arid August" to follow Dry July

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    1. A longtime overdueJuly 30, 2014 at 9:41 AM

      Oh, that's good, Arid August it is.

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    2. I like Arid August as well ! Lol

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  47. We need one that lasts a bit longer like a year. I'm telling people I feel so amazing after dry July that I feel it would be a shame to stop now as the real benefits kick in about 3 to 4 weeks so I'm going to see how long I can do it and just see where it takes me. That seems to do the trick. One friend asked how long do I mean and I said I don't know I'd quite like to do a year and review it then. They seem to find it easier to accept in their little wine drinking brains then forever!!! Come to think of it same as my small little brain!! Even though the intention really is permanent I just am not ready to go there right now....

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  48. Hi folks. Day 10. Double figures!! I can do this. And I bloody well will.

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    1. Big smiles to you inthegarage and well done! Those double digits sure feel good!

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  49. Good luck Inthegarage, I know you can too.. well done on double figures.

    This maybe just me, and I could be alone thinking like this, but I don't like Dry July. I have tried to distance myself from it as much as possible as I don't find it helpful to me. I tell people I am doing this for as long as it takes, that could be forever and I can't look any further than one day at a time. Every day is a challenge and a then a win when I achieve it. Dry July to me is a set period which can be too big for people like me that crave alcohol every day. But everyone is differant, so I am just coping the way that best suits me. Hope everyone can find a way that best suits them to get through the next 24 hours with me.

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    1. Agree Martin - maybe dry July just adds extra pressure to us all - keep doing what your doing as its working for you - thats all that counts, it's such a personal battle for all of us. Just got Jason Vale book today - another weapon in my arsenal! Stay strong bud!

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    2. Thanks Nancy Pants :-) - you too

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