Before I blah on about myself I just want to say that if anyone is still having trouble logging in to Living Sober please can you email me at admin@livingsober.org.nz so I can help you out. Thanks!
Just back from a 3-night camping trip that was very relaxing and fun. Nice to be home as well. All a bit ordinary and boring really - in terms of a post about where I'm at right now. Not sure where I'm at. I'm just 'at'.
I think I had a drinking dream last night - I'm not sure. There were people in our house (in the dream) drinking wine but I'm not sure if I was or how I was relating to it (miserable to be not drinking or happy to be not drinking?).. it was random.
I live, eat, breath recovery. I am sober. I blog about being sober. I share about being sober all over social media, and I run a community website that helps other people get sober. It's all amaze-balls, if not a little intense and vulnerable-making sometimes (I worry sometimes, am I sharing too much? Should I have put another photo of myself on Instagram? Maybe I'm being too big-headed or smug? Why are these spammers attacking us? Why are some members still locked out? Is everything ok in my online world? Yes it is Mrs D……it's all ok…….this is normal, spammers attack, websites have to come down every now and then, maybe don't post any more pictures of yourself for a while so people don't think you're up yourself.)
Still worrying about my diet (but not too much, can't be bothered).. I think I'm ok on the food front on balance and I am planning on joining a gym as soon as the kids head back to school. That will be good. I plan on working hard at my fitness for 2015 - I really let is slip in the whole 6 months after my book came out and all the craziness that followed that with the media, website launching, some public talks etc.
Actually now I type this I think I'm just doing some low-key rebuilding of energy after a very busy year (Mr D's work year was also insane and that impacted on me - needed to do the parenting alone quite a bit). Then of course we had a death in the family.
Ok this is good, this is why I blog. I'm figuring stuff out. All I'm figuring out now is that I'm in a re-building phase that has coincided gloriously with our long summer holidays where all the family is at home and we are hanging out together.
Tonight I will listen to some Tara Brach. And hopefully finish the new Russell Brand documentary on The War on Drugs. And I have just started a gratitude jar - an idea I heard about from one of our Living Sober members but apparently it came first from Elizabeth Gilbert. Every day I will write down one thing I am grateful for and put it in the 'jar' (mine is actually a bowl woven out of recycled newspapers that came from Trade Aid) and when I'm feeling low I'll dip into it for inspiration. Gratitude works, everyone knows that.. and I'm going to make it a regular practice.
Love, Mrs D xxx
Hi Mrs D. I love the idea of having a gratefulness jar. I might start one of those myself. Hope you have a brilliant 2015. Day 7 today for me. A x
ReplyDeleteHi Mrs D. Ive just finished reading your book, it was Amazing I loved it ! Your Amazing. When I first read the part when you used to wake up at 3am and feel like shit and feel guilty ect well thats me!
ReplyDeleteI couldnt believe what i was reading. Everything you said , I never knew anyone else had ever been through that.
My friend suggested for me to read your book after I spoke to her about how much I was drinking, and I did. So thank you for being so honest and thank you for writing it. My eyes now see better and my head is much clearer even though I have to work on liking myself sober! I too have three Awesome young kids who I would do anything for. So a new start for me.
Day 6 now for me!
Hey Lotta Gotta love a bit of Russell Brand! I've just started volunteering at a local drugs and alcohol rehab service and he's one of their patrons. I'm hoping I might get to bump into him one day when he's visiting - I wish!! xx
ReplyDeleteIt would be impossible not to second guess yourself from time to time Mrs D; To be unsure if you're being too open and sharing too much. Hell, sometimes I feel like that and all I do is leave a few comments here and there and no one really knows who I am. So I can imagine how you must feel sometimes. But the pendulum swings back from doubt to certainty and once again you realise that what you're doing is right and good........Personally I don't think there are enough pictures of you online: when you overtake Justin Bieber or the Kardashians or whoever, then I think it might be time to slow down.....hey, thought....maybe you could do your own reality TV show!!! How does that sound??!!!! (God, then you really might be big headed and smug!!! ;-)...... Thanks for sharing the gratitude box idea. I may try that one - it's so easy to forget about what you have. And now that you mention it I think I had a booze dream last night too.... don't think it was pleasant.... good job my memory has erased it! Have a sober day everyone, especially you, lovely lurker ;-)
ReplyDeleteYou are brilliant my friend and I love when you post like this. It makes me happy and gives me balance...because it's all about me you know.
ReplyDeleteTake care my smart, beautiful, successful AND SOBER friend!
Sherry
Hi Mrs D,
ReplyDeleteI am now over 150 days sober thanks to you. If you hadn't blogged and been so open I'm not sure how my life would have turned out but what I am sure of is that it wouldn't have been as wonderful as it is now.
Thank you for just being you. Don't change what you do. You save lives with your honesty and truth, I think you may have saved mine :) xxx
Hi Mrs D, i am on day 6 and feeling inspired. I have decided that I am not on a mini break but a life long commitment. reading your book and it could be me…I am a bit older and drank on a bit longer bit feeling motivated x
ReplyDeleteThere is a reason we are anonymous in the program...
ReplyDeleteI'm not a member of the programme but I've made a commitment to myself to not drink for a year. I've started to have drink dreams too. I wake up in a panic that I've had a drink and broken my commitment. But on the flip side I'm not waking up with the real guilt anymore. Keep going!
ReplyDeleteDo you think drink dreams are common....? Ive been off drink for months and still have them from time to tiime. Good reminder to tell me why Im not drinking, but will they ever go ? Or is it a plague i have to live with ?
DeleteWow! Your continued commitment to track and keep to your sobriety makes us not only cope with you with this, but also be concurrent with all the simultaneous kinds of movements that are hinged on something with much well meaning. Just remember to keep everything within the grasp of your hands, and make sure that you aren't dissuaded in making such a sobriety concrete through constant monitoring and interrogations with yourself, as well as your audience. Thanks for sharing that! I wish you all the best!
ReplyDeleteDonnie Benson @ Midwest Institute for Addiction