Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Gentle calmness...

I feel tired today but not too bad. Pottering around getting things ready for Christmas. We have some relatives staying from tomorrow and are hosting Christmas Day dinner for 20-odd (including kids). I am roasting a ginormous turkey and doing some vege - others are bringing salads, pudding etc.

Looking forward to it and keeping on reminding myself that it is LOVE that matters not CLEAN BENCHES!!

Feeling gentle in my sobriety. Not endorphin-rush this is THE BEST WAY TO LIVE!!, nor sad and woe-is-me WHY AM I DIFFERENT FROM THE REST OF THE WORLD?? Just quietly sober, quietly never touching alcohol ever. Quietly happy with the way my life is.

I'm alright.

Things are alright.

Actually maybe I lie. Maybe there is a little bit of elated joy inside me for being free from the booze trap.

I don't regret one percent being unable to moderate alcohol. I love being sober and the challenge it brings. I love the authenticity I am forced into experiencing because I never ever bend my brain or blur my reality.

Yeah - there's a little bit of endorphin-rush joy in there, bubbling below the surface.

In a very lovely, gentle, low-key, calm way.

Because that's what sobriety brings. Gentle calmness.

And that's what I'm feeling right now.

What a lucky lucky girl am I.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Love, Mrs D xxx


  1. Yep - me too. Gentle calmness. And a knowingness that all is right in my world and will continue to be. Plus we are exactly where are supposed to be.....Happy Family Christmas to you Mrs D.

  2. Merry Christmas to you too Lotta! Reaching my arms around the world to give you a big hug xx

  3. What a lovely blog entry. I share your feelings. For years I drank heavily, and I feel that a blessing in disguise, because it's what has opened my mind to the quiet beauty that permeates everything and every moment. Have a brilliant, lovely Christmas :)

  4. Merry Christmas to you, too!
    Gentle calmness is going to be my mantra!

  5. Merry Merry Christmas! Love this post! Quietly getting ready here too! A big thank you to you for all you have done this year to help so many! Blessings to you and family!

  6. Today is day 3 of my sober life. Mine has been a 3 year 'battle' with quiting a boozy lifestyle. I am in AA, and at one point in the last 3 years I had 16 months of sobriety. My relapse occurred because I 'forgot' what it was like, developed a resentment towards AA, and decided I was not an alcoholic. WRONG! I do not drink like normal people and it's just that simple.

    Mrs. D, I found your blog recently and I watched an interview with you and your husband last night. I have found courage and hope from your words. Thank you for sharing your journey so honestly and openly. I'm going to the book store today to get one of the books you've found helpful!

    Merry sober Christmas! ��