We have four weddings coming up over the next three months, so on top of the four that I have already been to since becoming sober, that means by the time I have 18 months of sobriety under my belt I will have attended 8 weddings.
I must have lost the memo that advises not making any big changes or undergoing lots of stress or too much social pressure when you first give up the booze. Because in those 18 months I would have also gone through a relocation (emotion!) and written an MA thesis (stress!).
At least I should be bloody rock solid in my non-drinking come the end of March (my 18 mth mark). I'm not stupid enough to think that means I can let my guard down and expect not to have any pangs. I've had some bloody annoying pangs just in the last few days ... stupid sly wine-drinking fox still lurking in my brain and eyeing up Mr D's wine glass... anyway... won't dwell on those. Piss off stupid pangs.
The first wedding I went to sober I acted like a total freak and ran around fetching other people drinks all night. Desperately trying to show that I was still cool with alcohol?! Obsessed with other people needing to drink like I used to? Who knows.. but that's what I did.
Second wedding I smoked like a train all night, looked after someone else who got leggless and had quite a nice time in the end actually.
Third wedding I had it figured out a little better, had one Red Bull at dinner for a nice energy boost and danced until after midnight!
Fourth wedding, again one energy drink at dinner and quite a nice night (small wedding and I didn't know many people so it was never going to be a cracker).
Overall with all of these four sober weddings I look back happily and proudly at how I carried myself. Not like other weddings I've been to when I've got very sloppy. For me weddings used to be a glorious opportunity to get totally hammered with lots of other people! A heavy drinkers dream!
Looking forward to the next four anyway.. nice to know we won't have to pay for taxis on top of transport, childcare and presents. Nice to know I'll be trustworthy all night and not get loose-lipped or sloppy. Have to stay positive that I won't be missing out...
Love, Mrs D xxx