So I had that slightly gritty phase, nothing too dramatic really, which led to those stupid melancholy feelings about alcohol. Like that liquid was actually going to do something to help?! I mean, really?! But came out fighting in the last post to remind myself why I. Am. Sober. Have been for 131 days now.
Took a bit more than just that fighting post to shake the melancholy, romantic feelings about drinking however. Seemed to be everywhere there were images and scenes of happy, cool drinking. So I've been having to do more mental exercise and employ some of my old tactics to rework my grey matter and remind it that I'm not missing out on anything.
That alcohol doesn't make any special occasion more special than it is without the booze. That bending my brain won't help me deal with life. That the boozy me isn't to be admired or envied, whereas the sober me is so great.
It helps that I seem to be getting a lot of comments about how good I look. It's not a weight loss thing. It's a 'you're just looking really good in your skin' type of comment. From Mr D, my sister and a couple of friends. Truth is I have lost some weight since I've gone sober, but (and this is strange), my body seems to be slowly changing shape. My tummy is still wobbly (3 kids and a huge appetite will make that hard to shake) and my boobs are still saggy but my arms are slimmer and my shoulders, collar bone & chin area all a bit more ... a bit more .. bony I suppose. So yeah, it's a weight loss thing .. but more .. more of a less puffy look (sorry about the writing there).
I've read about that puffy look before and never thought that I looked puffy before but the me now is definitely slightly more angular.
And boy do I sleep long and heavy now, regularly. So that helps. And no hangovers. Every morning clear eyed. These things are .. well they're glorious actually.
Went to a BBQ on Friday night and did everything else all the other adults were doing; laughed, chatted, ate, played cards, lit fireworks. But did it sober and stayed more alert toward the end. Was able to comfort the Little Guy calmly as he was terrified of the loud bangs, then drove everyone home. Woke up alert and happy and made a picnic lunch to take out for the day. Oh, get me!!!!!!!
Which leads me to my food stories, although this isn't a food blog I have been channelling Martha Stewart (or more Nigella Lawson) in the kitchen these last few days and loving it! Have made banana choc chip muffins, a silver beet and feta pie, a carrot cake, black eyed beans with fresh coriander and red onion, tabbouleh, pizzas (one with marinaded zucchini on top), a spanish omelet and a berry shortcake dessert. Awesome!!!!! Now about that wobbly tummy .....
Mrs D xxx